The ‘Soft Life’ Era, Autumn in Full Swing & A Slight Identity Crisis

October is officially here, and with it comes the annual identity crisis. One minute I’m clinging to the last bits of summer, still reaching for my linen shirts and refusing to accept the end of Aperol season; the next, I’m buying a cashmere coat, looking at tartan with fresh eyes, and wondering whether it’s too soon to put cinnamon sticks in a vase and call it tablescaping.

The whiplash is real. I’ve got SPF in one hand and a pumpkin-scented hand cream in the other. My Spotify is bouncing between beach playlists and acoustic covers of 80s classics. One morning I’m running errands in sandals, and by afternoon, I’m eyeing wool socks like they’re a lifestyle choice.

It’s not just about the temperature drop—it’s the identity pivot. I’m supposed to be emerging as a full autumnal goddess, all rich tones and emotional depth, but half of me is still living in a summer haze, wondering where I left my sunglasses and whether rosé counts as a transitional wine.

And yet—despite the confusion—I’m fully leaning in. and considering making soup from scratch. Who am I?

The shift has happened fast. The air is crisp, the city feels moodier, and every café within a two-mile radius has suddenly decided that pumpkin spice is a personality trait. The windows are steamed up, the playlists have pivoted to soft jazz, and I’m seeing knitwear in shop windows that makes me want to text exes just for emotional texture.

And honestly? I’m fully leaning in.

Social Scene: The City is Cosy Again

Something about October makes London feel 10x more romantic. The streets are golden, the air smells like woodsmoke (or maybe just overpriced candles), and suddenly, every social plan involves wine, dim lighting, and “let’s go somewhere cosy.” Even the chaos feels curated.

Recent highlights:

• A dreamy dinner at Chiltern Firehouse with Amelia & Liv – The fireplace, the cocktails, the fact that we somehow justified ordering three desserts. The kind of night that lingers like good perfume.

• An afternoon wandering Columbia Road Flower Market – Bought eucalyptus and immediately felt like I had my life together. Also bought a pot I didn’t need. No regrets.

• The return of theatre nights – Saw The Burnt City at Punchdrunk, felt cultured, then immediately went for dirty martinis at Dukes Bar because balance.

• Sundays at Maison François – Steak frites, good conversation, and me pretending I don’t have emails to answer. Sundays in soft focus.

Also: Everyone’s back from their Amalfi escapes and slowly re-emerging from hibernation with dinner invitations and strong opinions on knitwear.

Fashion: ‘Quiet Luxury’ But Make It Autumn

There’s something about October that makes me want to dress like a wealthy 90s film heroine. Think long coats, structured bags, neutral tones, and an effortless “I don’t try too hard” aesthetic. Fewer logos, more tailoring. Less trend, more timeless.

What’s currently on rotation:

• Max Mara ‘Teddy’ coat – Because it makes me feel like a very expensive human.

• The Row City loafers – I have fully entered my old money footwear era. No turning back.

• Cashmere everything – We are layering. And pretending our wardrobes are capsule collections.

• Ankle boots & structured blazers – Because if I’m wearing them, I must have my life together… right?

Also, let’s talk about the TikTok-approved ‘Mob Wife’ aesthetic. Bold lips, faux fur coats, power dressing. Am I attempting it? Maybe. Is it a fun contrast to the ‘soft girl autumn’ aesthetic? Absolutely. We are duality, darling.

Beauty & Wellness: The Autumn Reset

With the colder air comes a full routine refresh. Skincare is thicker, makeup is richer, and my self-care habits are suddenly influenced by every wellness influencer on Instagram. We are exfoliating less, moisturising more, and falling asleep to brown noise like we’re in a sleep study.

Current obsessions:

• The Augustinus Bader rich cream – Because hydration is a personality trait.

• Dior Rouge lipstick in ‘999’ – Nothing says “I have my life together” like a classic red lip.

• Infrared sauna sessions at Glow Bar – Because apparently, sweating in a tiny wooden box counts as self-care.

• Pumpkin candle phase activated – Currently burning Diptyque’s ‘Ambre’ like my life depends on it. A single flame and suddenly I’m Gwyneth Paltrow with a past.

Also: I bought a silk eye mask and now I sleep like I own a villa in Provence.

Mindset: The Soft Life Era

If there’s one theme for October, it’s embracing ‘soft life’ energy—that slightly slower, more romantic approach to everyday life. Less rushing, more enjoying the moments. Less grind, more glide.

What that looks like for me:

• More dinner parties, fewer chaotic nights out – Candles, cheese boards, and friends who text “home safe” after.

• More slow mornings, fewer rushed coffee runs – The oat flat white hits different when brewed slowly at home.

• More reading in bed, fewer late-night Instagram spirals – Currently obsessed with Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow. I get the hype.

Soft life isn’t about doing nothing—it’s about doing things with intention. It’s about presence. And matching pyjamas.

Pop Culture, Trends & What’s Happening Right Now

• Taylor Swift’s ‘Midnights’ era is incoming, and the internet is unhinged.

• The ‘Clean Girl’ aesthetic is officially being replaced by ‘Stealth Wealth.’ We are subtle now. We wear Khaite sweaters and pretend we don’t check our emails at midnight.

• Autumn holiday escapes are trending – hello, Lake Como, Copenhagen, and weekend getaways to the Scottish Highlands. Wool coats, novels, and boutique hotels. We’re all just trying to live in an Instagram Reel.

Also: If you’re not romanticising your Sunday grocery run by wearing a trench and buying figs, what are you even doing?

The Month Ahead: What’s Coming?

• An autumn city escape? I might be heading to Edinburgh for a cosy weekend. The kind of trip that involves too many scarves and exactly the right number of cinnamon buns.

• A wardrobe refresh – Because I have convinced myself that a new Totême scarf will solve all my problems.

• More ‘soft life’ moments – Romanticising the season, one overpriced oat milk latte at a time.

• Creative clarity – I can feel ideas brewing like a strong black tea. Maybe it’s time to write something more… longform?

October, let’s make this a good one.

Sophie x